'The Sorcerer's Apprentice'

'The Sorcerer's Apprentice' (PG) (1 1/2 stars)

Writers: Matt Lopez, Doug Miro and Carlo Bernard
Director: Jon Turteltaub
Starring: Nicolas Cage, Jay Baruchel, Alfred Molina, Monica Belucci, Omar Benson Miller, Alice Krige, Teresa Palmer

"The Sorcerer's Apprentice" comes from Jerry Bruckheimer and Walt Disney Pictures and like all Bruckheimer pictures it is all light, noise and explosions. There aren't any characters to really like or root for. The writing is terrible and the story is recycled from many other movies. It is all heartless CGI effects and it is messy, too busy and also mind numbing. The only reason I didn't hate it is because I can see kids getting into it but I was close to despising it. It is no different than "The Mummy" movies or "The X Men" movies or the plethora of fantasy films out in the past few years. They are all the same movie and there is nothing that separates these movies in my mind. CGI effects have taken over and these movies don't require any story or well written dialogue. This is another lackluster fantasy movie this year and the only thing you can count on these days are the Harry Potter films. I was absolutely bored by the whole movie and I can only see very little kids liking it. So if you are a parent leave the kids at this movie and duck into "The Kids Are All Right" or how about you take the kids to go see "Despicable Me" and "The Karate Kid" again, both movies considerably better. There is no heart to this movie and Nicolas Cage is sleep walking again through another role. Alfred Molina is wasted and the blond love interest is a typical boring girlfriend role. The breathtaking Monica Belucci is totally wasted, and no offense to Nick Cage, when him and Belucci kissed I went "Ewww". I know sorcerers are from the Middle Ages but come on take a shower! Cage is all dirty and he looks like he does not want to be there. I could explain the plot but then I would be disrespecting the old, classic "Fantasia" segment of "The Sorcerer's Apprentice" with Mickey Mouse. The hero, Jay Baruchel, does look like Mickey Mouse but he is miscast and is unusually lifeless. I strongly urged everyone to see "The Karate Kid" and "Despicable Me" was fun so please avoid this and see those movies if you haven't. I think it is about time to send a message to Jerry Bruckheimer that his act is getting old. Let's make this turkey a box office bomb so we can get more movies with personality.