'The A Team'

'The A Team' (PG-13) (2 stars)

Writers: Joe Carnahan, Brian Bloom and Skip Woods
Director: Joe Carnahan
Starring: Liam Neeson, Bradley Cooper, Sharlto Copley, Quinton "Rampage" Jackson, Patrick Wilson, Jessica Biel, Gerard McRaney, Brian Bloom

I hated the television series "The A Team" when I was younger. I couldn't sit through more than a half hour of any episode so two episodes were enough. I expected the new "A Team" movie to be dumb and this movie is dumb but not in a good way. When a goofy summer action movie tries to get too complicated for it's own good it goes from dumb to delusional. Did I like the action sequences and the comedy aspects of this movie? No. The action is confusing and full of MTV cuts and is so full of edits that I couldn't follow what was going on in those scenes. Also the movie is not funny because I didn't laugh once, I maybe smiled two times. It is not a boring movie because there are a plethora of beautiful Hollywood people in it that are really good to look at. The pace is fast but why was I bored and wanting to leave? But you say Vince, it is supposed to be a dumb, silly popcorn movie and that would be good because I love those kinds of movies. The problem is I couldn't figure out why the movie thinks it has a story that is so clever and intricate. I did not find this movie the least bit entertaining. The movie should actually be dumbed down and I would have had more fun. I can't even tell you anything that happened in this movie without someone getting confused.

Now let's get to the acting. Liam Neeson looks strange and phones in his performance. "Rampage" Jackson has presence but the acting is awkward, Sharlto Copley is wasted especially after his great "District 9" performance. The movie never stands still to make us really give a crap about anybody. The only reason I can recommend that you see this is to watch some really hot movie stars. Now there are four very attractive people to watch here. Bradley Cooper is going to be a star and a successful leading man very soon. He has charisma, a very impressive body and he is charming. Jessica Biel is someone who is growing on me because I thought she was very good here and she also has an incredible body and is very good to look at. The bad guys are way more interesting than the heroes and they also look pretty. Patrick Wilson and Brian Bloom as the villains share with Biel the best scene in the movie. It is set in a car and it is a car full of pretty people. This movie is full of pretty people but I am sure that is not the movie's primary goal. "The A Team" is sloppy, dull and I feel like I wasted my time. Did I mention all the pretty people in it? I guess what I am saying is that the "The A Team" reaaly provides nothing worthwhile.